Guest Article Written By: James L. Casale, Ph.D.
“Our deeds determine us, as much as we determine our deeds.” – George Eliot, Adam Bede
In recent years, reports of severe bullying have repeatedly drawn public attention. In May 2012, the parents of an eighth grader at a private Christian school in Florida sued the school after their son was allegedly kicked and repeatedly stabbed with pencils, requiring two emergency room visits. A nationally quoted bullying expert, Paul Coughlin, observed that “no school is immune to bullying.”
Another Florida incident involved a recorded fight in a Palm Beach County middle school classroom that later aired on local television and online. School officials noted that such fights occur at many local middle schools, and district policy dictated that students may not fight back—only attempt to ward off punches. Both boys involved were suspended.
One particularly tragic episode involved Wayne Treacy, a ninth grader from Deerfield Beach, Florida, who later described himself as “a monster” after stomping on the head of Mary Joe Ratley, leaving her with life-changing injuries. The attack reportedly followed a sarcastic text Mary Joe sent about the recent suicide of Wayne’s brother.
Extreme Consequences of Bullying
- The horrific shootings at Columbine High School, where students and staff were killed.
- An increase in adolescent suicides linked to bullying and cyberbullying.
- Hazing incidents such as the fatal case at Florida A&M that resulted in the death of a band member.
The Data
Large-scale surveys show bullying is widespread. Findings from the 2009 Crime Supplement to the National Crime Victimization Survey reported that roughly 28 percent of students ages 12–17 said they were bullied at school. A Centers for Disease Control analysis of the 2009 Massachusetts Youth Health Survey, which included nearly 6,000 public middle and high school students, found that 43.9 percent of middle school respondents and 30.5 percent of high school respondents experienced bullying.
Research consistently links bullying to other risk factors, including lower academic achievement, substance use, and family violence. National organizations such as the National Education Association and information from the Department of Justice confirm that bullying is a pervasive and often underreported problem in American schools.
Bullying: What Is It?
Bullying includes any repeated physical or verbal harassment intended to harm or intimidate. Common images that come to mind are fighting, pushing, name-calling, insults, and taunting, but the definition is broader: stalking, threats, theft of property, and social exclusion are all forms of bullying. Kathleen Winkler, for example, describes bullying that deliberately isolates a student from peers as a serious form of harm.
Myths About Bullying
Mona O’Moore and Stephen Minton, in Dealing with Bullying in Schools (2004), identify several persistent myths:
- “It’s just part of growing up.”
- “Boys will be boys.”
- “Every school has it—don’t worry.”
- “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”
- “Bullying never really harmed me.”
- “It will toughen you up.”
These beliefs are misleading and damaging. Bullying is not an acceptable rite of passage, words can and do cause lasting harm, and exposure to harassment does not build resilience in a healthy way.
The School’s Response
James Garabino and Ellen DeLara, in And Words Can Hurt Forever (2002), emphasize that many children feel unsafe in schools that adults consider physically secure. They argue that a school’s system and culture can allow continued harassment and emotional harm.
Parents should not wait for schools to volunteer information about policies and safety measures. Be proactive: ask for district and school policies, attend meetings, and ensure you understand how incidents are handled. Schools can adopt many measures to confront bullying effectively, but policies and programs are only useful when school leaders put them into practice.
- Adopt evidence-based anti-bullying programs.
- Post clear messages and expectations throughout the school.
- Provide conflict resolution lessons as part of the curriculum.
- Host trained guest speakers and provide staff in-service training.
- Monitor known “hot spots” (hallways, cafeterias, playgrounds, parking lots, buses) with suitable supervision.
- Distribute policy statements to students and parents and document reported incidents.
- Apply consistent consequences and offer counseling support for victims and aggressors.
- Engage parent organizations and local law enforcement when appropriate; review and evaluate interventions regularly.
All of these steps are valuable, but they are ineffective without strong leadership and consistent follow-through. In practice, no one will care about your child’s safety more than you do—so active parental involvement remains essential.
Suggestions for Parents
Bullying and cyberbullying fall under the broader concern of school safety and security. While accidents can occur, negligence should not be part of the equation. The following actions help parents stay informed and protect their children:
- Determine whether your state has anti-bullying or cyberbullying legislation and whether your district policy reflects it.
- If possible, serve on school committees and attend parent meetings.
- Encourage your child to report bullying, whether they are a victim or a bystander.
- Learn conflict resolution strategies and model them at home.
- Form or join a group of engaged parents to advocate for safer school policies.
- Limit cellphone and social-networking use for children under 16, or restrict devices to family-only contacts and emergency numbers.
- If bullying occurs in the classroom, arrange a conference with the teacher; for incidents in common areas, speak with the principal.
- If school responses are inadequate, escalate concerns to the superintendent or involve law enforcement for serious situations.
- Consider withdrawing a child from a school if their safety cannot be assured.
- Use reputable books and resources to stay informed and involve the school’s parent organization in prevention efforts.
Cyberbullying
Cyberbullying has amplified the reach and impact of harassment. The tragic suicide of 14-year-old Jamey Rodemeyer (reported as Jamey Rodenmeyer in some accounts) in Buffalo, NY, after vicious online attacks about his sexuality, highlights the lethal potential of online abuse. Schools have also seen increases in suspensions for “sexting” and the posting of sexually suggestive comments and photos, as with the Edward B. Shallow Junior High School in New York City.
Jennifer Holladay defines cyberbullying as using technology to harass, humiliate, or threaten another person. Social networks, texting, and email can instantly expose a child to thousands of viewers and multiply the damage. Where passing notes once represented non-confrontational harassment, modern technology allows rapid, widespread attacks that are harder to control.
Practical Steps to Reduce Cyberbullying
- Restrict and monitor the use of electronic devices and social media accounts.
- Know your child’s friends and the parents of those friends.
- Encourage face-to-face interactions and supervised playdates for younger children.
- Emphasize educational uses for devices and set clear rules about acceptable online behavior.
Bullying and cyberbullying are complex problems that require sustained attention from parents, educators, and communities. Clear policies, consistent leadership, active supervision, and engaged families form the best defense to protect children’s safety and well-being.