By A. Mercedes Nalls, Ph.D.
Faculty member, School of Education at American Public University
Making choices about education and careers is something we all face. When weighing options, do you rely only on your own thinking, or do you reach out to others for input? If you ask for help, who do you consult? Understanding where people turn for guidance can improve how we approach career decisions and build stronger support networks.
Historically, career counselors emphasized individual decision-making. Clients completed inventories and assessments designed to match personal traits with an occupation (Schultheiss, 2003). The idea was to find the best fit between a person and a job based primarily on autonomous choices.
More recent career-development research reframes decision-making as inherently relational. Contemporary theorists argue that adults make career choices within the context of relationships and social connections (Blustein, Phillips, Jobin-Davis, Finkelberg, & Roarke, 1997; Schultheiss, Kress, Manzi, & Glasscock, 2001; Schultheiss, Palma, Predragovich, & Glasscock, 2002). These connections contribute to identity and self-esteem, and studies show that people who seek support from others tend to navigate transitions more successfully (e.g., Murphy, Blustein, Bohlig, & Platt, 2010).
My research examined whom college students consult about long-term goals and career plans (Nalls, 2011). Students most often named parents, peers, significant others, and siblings as primary sources of advice and emotional support. Siblings, in particular, emerged as important advisors regardless of age differences or gender—a finding consistent with earlier work by Blustein and colleagues (1997) and Schultheiss and colleagues (2001; 2002), who also identified siblings as frequent supports during career exploration and transition.
When students described the role siblings played in their planning, three themes stood out: siblings acted as role models or mentors, provided multidimensional support, and were often described as best friends. Students’ own words illustrate these roles:
“She is my sounding board in most decisions I make. She is one of the people in my life who knows me best, so I value her perspective in my life. She does have somewhat of an influence on my future plans because we are so close. I’m sure she wants to give advice that would keep me close to her and I would want to do the same!”
“I see her playing a role of giving advise, and helping me work through the pros and cons of different paths to take in my future.”
“They [siblings] are the supportive ones even when my parents and friends don’t seem to understand.”
“She does not try to change my mind or talk me out of decisions that I make, like my parents might try to. If she does not agree with a decision she tells me and explains why, but always supports me no matter what.”
Although my study focused specifically on siblings, it also found that students frequently preferred turning to significant others, family members, and peers rather than institutional figures such as professors, clergy, or formal mentors. Consistent with this pattern, Murphy et al. (2010) reported that students rarely listed career counselors as primary sources of support during the college-to-career transition.
These findings have practical implications for professionals who advise students. Guidance counselors, career counselors, academic advisors, and faculty mentors should acknowledge the informal networks students rely on and help students make the most of those relationships. Advisors can encourage students to include trusted family members and peers in career conversations, teach students how to solicit constructive feedback, and model ways to balance personal values with external input.
The practical takeaway is clear: when you are facing a challenging career or education decision, you are more likely to reach a good outcome if you involve others. Even a brief conversation with a sibling, friend, or family member can clarify options, reveal blind spots, and strengthen your confidence in a chosen path. Building and using a support network is a strategic step in career planning—not a sign of weakness, but a step toward better, more informed choices.
References
Blustein, D. L., Phillips, S. D., Jobin-Davis, K., Finkelberg, S. L., & Roarke, A. E. (1997). A theory-building investigation of the school-to-work transition. The Counseling Psychologist. Special Issue: School-to-Work Transition, 25(3), 364-402. doi:10.1177/0011000097253002
Murphy, K. A., Blustein, D. L., Bohlig, A. J., & Platt, M. G. (2010). The college-to-career transition: An exploration of emerging adulthood. Journal of Counseling and Development, 88(2), 174-181.
Nalls, A. M. (2011). The role of siblings in the identity formation process of emerging adults. Retrieved from http://diginole.lib.fsu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=3435&context=etd
Schultheiss, D. E. P. (2003). A relational approach to career counseling: Theoretical integration and practical application. Journal of Counseling and Development, 81(3), 301-310. doi: 10.1002/j.1556-6678.2003.tb00257.x
Schultheiss, D. E. P., Kress, H. M., Manzi, A. J., & Glasscock, J. M. J. (2001). Relational influences in career development: A qualitative inquiry. The Counseling Psychologist, 29(2), 214-239. doi:10.1177/0011000001292003
Schultheiss, D. E. P., Palma, T. V., Predragovich, K. S., & Glasscock, J. M. J. (2002). Relational influences on career paths: Siblings in context. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 49(3), 302-310. doi:10.1037/0022-0167.49.3.302
About the Author
Dr. A. Mercedes Nalls is a part-time professor at American Public University and has taught online since 2007. She holds a BS in molecular biology and religious studies from Vanderbilt University, an MAR from Yale Divinity School, and an MS and PhD in Child Development from Florida State University.